Ease My Heart

Teresa ~ 61.100508

I have to say that any digging, no matter how slight, into my adoptive past is usually done with an equal mixture of interest and dread.  I have often thought about the White Shield home, imagining it as something along the lines of a dark, awful orphanage (think Jane Eyre). I imagined strict, nun-like disapproval of the young girls and women who found themselves pregnant and in need of a place like White Shield.  However, I just finished reading your story about your visit, and it has eased a burden on my heart that I have carried for my birth mother.

I was born Mary P., (now Teresa) at White Shield in 1961.  I was at the Home for three months before I was adopted, from what I understand. I always wondered if my birth mother and I were in the same building for at least part of that time.

I have always been grateful for my birth mother’s selflessness (hopefully by her choice, but most likely she didn’t have much of one), and guilty that she was forced (as she was from back East, I am assuming she was ‘sent away’) to spend her pregnancy and childbirth in a bitter, hostile environment.

To find out that she was in a place that, although not a perfect one, seemed to be at least not the awful, fearful place I had always imagined it to be is such a relief to me.  Hopefully she made friends with some of the other young women there, and had their support and love.

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